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------ 25-5 Another week, another lackluster turnout for the BAD ASS Baseball League. During the week, one member of the league stopped just shy of pleading for at least 10 members to show up on the Smackboard, something inconceivable 6 weeks ago. But I will say this—those who aren’t showing up, for whatever reason, are missing some pretty entertaining exhibition games! While it’s all but a certainty that the Testes Takers/Orphans series will not resume in 2005, and we do miss those who have prematurely called it a season, I feel it’s time to quit dwelling on what’s NOT happening, and appreciate the fact that many of us can still get together, have fun, get high, swap stories and add to an ever-growing list of BAD ASS memories.
The first of two exhibition games started 4-on-3, and became 5-on-5 as Rob Flores, Tito Bernal and Bryan Bush slowly filtered in. Flores and Bush teamed with Cav Manning, Al Padron and Leland Yow (D’backs) to face off against Bernal, Brandon Hamilton, Skillz Epps, Alvin Trinh and Torance Matsui (Giants). It was a massacre by the D-backs who capitalized on several Giant errors. Highlights from that game include Epps nearly breaking Yow’s ankle after the latter overran second base. Desperate for an out, Epps dove to tag Yow out (which he did) and ended up rolling over his leg--both men were OK. Another highlight was Padron nearly becoming the first man in modern BAB history to make all three outs in an inning. In the fifth, having already made his team’s two outs, Padron hit a chopper toward Epps that gained life as it bounced, almost as if Al willed it over Epps’ head into the OF. Manning earned Matsui’s ire when the latter hit a two-strike pop into foul territory. It was certainly within Cav’s range, but he deliberately let it fall to give Torance his first whiff of the year. Manning was sworn at from the outfield for several innings.
The most poignant highlight came in the gimp form of Steven Rebetrano, the rookie BS who broke his ankle in Game 4 of the Terrorists/Donkeys series. Rebetrano, on crutches, worked his way down to the dugout and shared daps and high fives with all the players as he related his ordeal—basically, there’s now as much metal as bone in his right leg. He says he could be back in a month should the league still have games going, and we can’t get him back fast enough—he’s a body! (Jokin’, Steve!)
Game Two was nearly a Dirty Sanchez/non-Sanchez matchup—the ball-roll selection method saw Flores, Bernal, Epps, Bush and Hamilton (A’s) take on Manning, Matsui, Trinh, Yow and Padron (Angels). 25-5 was the final in favor of the Halos, and it wasn’t even that close. Every member of the Angel lineup used exceptional bat control to dink single after single through and past the A’s infield, leading to some VERY long innings. Highlights include Hamilton nearly taking P Yow’s face off with a laser from about six feet away, Epps hitting a foul right at a passing pickup that luckily caromed off a light post before doing any damage, and the most hilarious of all—Padron, at BS, trying to get on SportsCenter by catching a Skillz popup while flat on his back. It didn’t matter to either side that the ball hit the turf; everyone was doubled over laughing too hard to care. Alley Kat had every reason to feel invincible; he set a new record—for lefties—with eight consecutive hits during the Athletic disassembly.
GAME NOTES:
· I’m done listing absences—there are just too many of them. · Epps struck out three consecutive times over the two games. · The game was played at Gill Park. The winds eased up from last week—there were a few warning-track blasts—but not enough to prevent a fourth straight week without an over-the-fence homer. · Hamilton enjoyed another strong defensive game, at least while playing OF. He was officially upgraded from “Shit Brandon” to “Piss Brandon” during Game Two, with the chance to become “Puke Brandon” with continued strong play. |